Tag Archives: Sports Day

Sports Day Redux

Way back in the bright and skin-meltingly hot days of mid-July I wrote about my battle against the unforgiving and merciless nature of a mechanical representation of uncontrolled bovine violence. How I took on a mechanical bull and ultimately lost and the price I paid for delaying my defeat. What I neglected to mention was that the entire thing was called off half way through due to a massive downpour finally arriving. It had been threatening to do so the entire day but finally decided to wash us out right in the middle of our “fun.” The ground quickly turned into a thick, soupy quagmire of dirt. My team were slated for a game of football, I was genuinely looking forward to the game, what with the conditions having finally made it to what I would call “proper” football weather.  But Messrs Health and Safety weren’t too keen on this plan so everything was called to a stop. Naturally ten minutes later the rain had stopped, but we’d all packed up by that point. The decision was made by the powers-that-be to reschedule the entire thing and finish it off properly. So that’s I did this Wednesday afternoon, as once again me and my workmates set out for the company sports day.

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The Bull

I will be the first to admit that I am not a particularly sporting man. There was a time, in the dim and distant past, when the concept of sport was not so utterly strange and alien to me. A time when I was roped into games of football and cricket. There was even a time when a much younger, thinner, more agile and seven stone version of myself used to play rugby twice a week. Needless to say this did not end well. Agility, speed and above average height could only take me so far in a game where I regularly faced off against people quite literally twice my weight. People whose sole purpose in the game seemed to be to inflict severe and most grievous harm upon my person. I played scrum-half, the pain magnet and the opposition forwards always had murder in their eyes. Three days laid up in a hospital bed with a severe concussion somewhat put-paid to any further sporting aspirations in this field. Once I moved away to university sport vanished almost completely from my life, being replaced with the delights of reading, computer games and so many other delightful distractions that had been so frowned upon back home, my time forever being scrutinised under the judging eyes of the sport-maddened loons I called family. It was therefore with some trepidation that I approached Wednesday afternoon. For you see, Wednesday afternoon was Sport’s Day

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